DOMestic Bdsm and Female Domination

The Fem Dom Training Program.
Train your husband/lover.

* * * start of the digest * * *

Re: C: how to be a better dominatrix
Date: 11 Jul 2009 17:38:50 -0000
From: Willing to learn....

I too am new to this whole thing.. and actually we tried it for
the first time last night.. and well.. it ended up going
nowhere...

Thank you all for your great advice, and any more you post!

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: Domestic Discipline - Disciplinary Wives
From: "bobbi-jo Morapedi"
Date: Wed, 08 Jul 2009 05:59:24 -0400 (EDT)

Hello,

I haven't posted here in years, but as I have stuff on my mind,
I thought I would try to put it into words around this article.

David wrote:

>Our 30th anniversary was in June 2009. I mention this to
>demonstrate that FemDom can lead to longevity in relationships
>and it's not just about kinky sex games in the bedroom.

I have been with my Wife for 15 years (on and off). Femdom has
been a part of our lives sometimes but lots of, uhm, issues get
in the way.

>For some disciplinary wives it takes the form of a household
>regime with precise rules and regulations defined by the wife
>or dominant partner.

Or even for some naturally dominant women with sometimes
assertive husbands that want to submit but can't cope with
certain crazy tendencies or ideas they don't/can't agree with.

>Disciplinary rituals like daily spankings or mild floggings are
>indulged in by some, not as a punishment for an infraction of
>the rules, but simply as a reminder to the male submissive of
>the authority of his loving wife.

There was a period when our day started - and continued - like
that. Made it quite difficult to concentrate while in the
office!

>For other male subs, like myself, the pain is not directly a
>pleasurable physical sensation, far from it, but the surrender
>to strict feminine discipline is more of an emotional need. The
>female order, guidance and punishment for rules broken is so
>satisfying that the pain is not merely a price worth paying but
>is essential to making the female authority more real and
>apparent.

And that can be a feeling that simply doesn't go away. Even if
one believes the whole thing is male fantasy, selfishness,
stupid. When one knows the Woman needs to be protected from the
world, supported - needs to depend on strength in bad times.

>There is no need for a power struggle between them.

Would that it were always so.

>There are couples where the husband wishes to surrender to
>absolute control over his life, not just socially and sexually,
>but financially -snip- We tried it, and it wasn't quite right
>for us.

Seems to me that that isn't quite right for any person. YMMV.

>allow the relationship to grow and change, as many healthy
>relationships do over the years -snip- don't define what a
>FemDom relationship is like. Let it happen by being open and
>honest about your desires when she wants to talk about them
>and encourage her to know and understand what her needs and
>desires are.

As has been said, sometimes any expression of these desires can
be difficult.

Conventional sexual relationships, for me, are not so erotic as
Femdom ones. Right now my Wife desires sex more than i. i'm not
so aroused by her for conventional sex so fantasise about
others. Perhaps this is normal when couples are so familiar to
each other. Perhaps also when people change and for example
don't have the figure they had 10 years ago. So it is difficult
for me and i think She grows frustrated by this. There are other
factors as always but i won't digress.

Seems to me that my wife might have a much more rewarding sex
life if She took another stroll down the avenue of taking charge
in the bedroom etc. But we continued to negotiate about RL. It
is a fact that i would very soon be so focused on Her that i
wouldn't need to fantasise.

Hinting occurred to me - signing up her email address to
DOMestic or purchasing the training software. Some might do that
but it seems like that would be me forcing the issue and my
needs at the expense of Hers. Doesn't seem right.

So, i'm at an impasse - unable to honestly be the Dominant male
and satisfy her which She wants sometimes but couldn't really
live with as her nature is to be in charge. Unable to be the
submissive husband that She want's sometimes and that i know
would be rewarding for myself.

i recall the excitement a little while back when she remarked on
wanting a naked slave to come and clean all her shoes. So
naturally, i did that - cleaned and polished some 30 pairs.
Hoping maybe that she would take a step - but it didn't happen.

That's enough from me but there's not too much traffic on the
list so I don't feel too bad about rambling and haven't even
edited much as it probably says more about me if i don't. Lots
of folk on this list are insightful - i'd appreciate any
perspective.

In Re: X: FemDom Training Program XP IE8, Christine wrote:

>Looking ahead to 2022 (another 13 years) we wonder whether
>we'll have some new technology going and be zapping it straight
>into your brains by then. :-)

Best to all and thanks for such a good resource - hope you're
around a lot longer still but am not really sure i want stuff
uploaded directly to my head yet!

manyana

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: good femdom retreat?
Date: 12 Jul 2009 18:58:56 -0000
From: Shadowlady

Recently I received a message from Mylady.

In it she indicated that the BDSM B&B in New Zealand the
wonderful House of Two is closing its doors on the 30th
September 2009. Unless, of course, it is sold as a going
concern.

As a previous guest of theirs I am sad to hear this news. It was
a great play area as well as a lovely setting.

Shadowlady

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: humiliation ideas needed
Date: 7 Jul 2009 20:36:50 -0000
From: "S"

M wrote:

>looking for some fresh new ideas that will make my slave
>squirm, blush, and be downright mortified with humiliation.

Why don't you keep his rear plugged with a buttplug for the
weekend, or get him a new piercing (nipples?). A humiliating
tattoo is nice, but you can't undo it easily (you can cover it
up with a bigger one later in some cases).

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: humiliation ideas needed
Date: 7 Jul 2009 21:17:12 -0000
From: subbie

M wrote:

>taking my slave to a weekend long outdoor SM event with 200
>other pervys -snip- He has a very small penis

I think a pretty little pink bow to "magnify" the tiny dick should do
nicely.

Have a great weekend of fun.

subbie

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: humiliation ideas needed
From: PapaHertz69
Date: Tue, 7 Jul 2009 17:54:46 EDT

Dear DOMestic enthusiasts:

I'm writing in reply to the Domme who wanted some humiliation
ideas for her SO during an outdoor camping BDSM experience. I
read somewhere years ago that a #6 fishing wire is practically
invisible.

[possibly #6; would one of the fishing capable readers please
correct for the size fishing wire that is practically invisible
against most backgrounds. T Y]

The article described the way a Domme controlled her slave
during a shopping excursion, either just to make sure he didn't
stray, or to 'humiliate' him by making his movements in
following her footsteps a 'herky-jerky' nature.

In the article, the Domme explained she tied the wire to his
cock, [probably to a ring, I just cannot recall, but I canNOT
imagine tying fishing line directly to a penis,] then threaded
it up and over the top of his pants, or shorts, as the case may
be; and then left about a six foot length which she grabbed the
end of, thus controlling his movements to some extent.

The humiliation was in the slave's awkward movements, either
trying to keep up with his wife, when she accelerated her pace
or, alternatively, not keeping the wire slack when she stopped
abruptly.

It seems to me the Domme might want, instead, to use one of
those ubiquitous dog leashes that can be extended or retracted
at will by the holder. Yes, I know being led on a leash is often
considered a treat, which a slave 'endures' proudly, but for
humiliation purposes, the ability to upset the slave's gait,
making his movements more than awkward, ridiculous in fact, to
me seems the height of humiliation. I hope this helps.

Papahertz,
sometime trainer of femmedomme wannabees.

[As I describe it, I seek women who, IMHO, have the 'chops' to
become outstanding pro or lifestyle dommes and, in most cases,
when they've allowed me to 'top from the bottom' [providing
feedback unattainable by any other mentor, male or female,] they
emerge as skilled dommes, and in one or two cases, outstanding
professional dominatrices.

I have found that the art of imposing humiliation upon a slave,
a submissive, or especially a paying client, to be one of the
signal abilities that can be brought out in a femme subject.
Much of it is verbal, consisting not only in how something is
said, but also the ways, including humor, in which the
humiliation is inflicted.

If I may be permitted a personal anecdote, please, at a femdom
party tried, unusually, on a Saturday morning in central Orange
County, there were five femdommes, mostly lifestyle, but with a
couple of prodommes who worked out of the host dungeon also
present, while I was the only sub who arrived promptly early on
the assigned morning.

Accordingly one of my all time fantasies, a 'gang rape' by
several authoritarian females took place. It was a rape in
theory only, for as we all know, everything in BDSM is 'SSC',
safe, sane, and above all, consensual. And further, since the
dungeon did not allow penetration, [for legal reasons, to avoid
similarity to, or actual, acts of prostitution. Please contact
me privately for an explanation of how some dungeons are able to
advertise 'anything goes' despite the legal opinion mentioned
above. My email addie is PapaHertz69@aol.com T Y,] What took
place was more properly a 'gang bang' in the loosest sense of
the word.

One of the femdoms was in a sense my Mistress for, at the time,
I was her 'house' security for sessions she took at a garage in
her home, made over into a first class dungeon. Mistress led me
to the stage in one of the dungeon rooms, bade me kneel on all
fours, and grabbing my 'package', [or privates, if you prefer,
to describe my C&B,] pulled them back behind me while attaching,
and locking, a "humbler" [write me also privately for a
description, if desired] atop and beneath the 'package'. This
left me particularly vulnerable to whatever ministrations the
ladies chose to apply.

Two of the ladies used wooden paddles upon my left cheek, two
others upon the right, all hitting me simultaneously. The
prodomme who administered humiliation in a delicate but also
hilarious way, stood behind me with a five or six foot whip,
more precisely known as a 'single tail'. Cracking me a few times
with it, she suddenly stopped and remarked, as explanation for
her quitting, "but it's SUCH a small target!" Nuff said. I did
NOT laugh, though I was 'sore' tempted.

Thank you ALL for your indulgence in allowing my extreme
verbosity in drawing out such a simple tale of a clever
humiliation. I know my imprecise manner of story telling can be
boring, but in this instance, I dawdled with purpose. I
invariably get a pleasant erection reliving the experience.

My pseudo 'gang rape' was one of the highlights of my ten - plus
years as a sometime subbie [I am an inveterate switch, having
tried in vain to follow advice I was given to come down on one
side, or the other, of the BDSM see-saw.]

PapaHertz69 aka s.a.m.

PapaHertz69@aol.com
email address info

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: humiliation ideas needed
Date: 8 Jul 2009 02:37:47 -0000
From: vince

M wrote:

>taking my slave to a weekend long outdoor SM event with 200
>other pervys

I am wondering where the event is going to be, and yes thinking
of being naked and plugged and even a bow would be so
humiliating for three days, but also wonderful. Would love to be
there.

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: humiliation ideas needed
Date: 8 Jul 2009 09:59:17 -0000
From: rudysroost

You could paint all twenty of his nails bright red, keep him on
a leash and collar and invite everyone you meet to sign him with
a permanent marker. Perhaps plan a punishment if he doesn't
collect at least one hundred signatures.

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: humiliation ideas needed
Date: Thu, 9 Jul 2009 09:26:30 -0700 (PDT)
From: Tom Jones

Since I also am embarrassingly small (but not that small),
please allow me to suggest what would be humiliating to me.
Perhaps these are not fresh ideas for you, so take them for what
they are:

1) Make up a flyer prior to the event announcing a certain time
that your sub will be on display. Prominent in this hand-out
will be something like "Come see the world's smallest cock." The
day of the event, your sub will be bound and hooded, so that he
will be able to hear all who come to look, hear their comments
and laughter, but not be able to see who is looking.

2) If you are into forced fem, have him wear panties and bra as
he goes around the event handing out the flyers announcing his
pending display. In any case, he should be required to hand out
the flyers.

3) Make a t-shirt, cap, or banner announcing "World's smallest."

4) Make him carry a ruler wherever he goes as a reminder of his
small size.

5) Have him apologize to other Dommes in attendance for his lack
of manliness, "I am sorry, Mistress, that you should have to
witness something as pathetic as my tiny pee-pee."

Have fun! Tom

* * * next message * * *

Re: P: San Antonio, Texas - submissive females
Date: 8 Jul 2009 14:25:39 -0000
From: Roger

Can someone help me get in contact with submissive females in
San Antonio?

* * * next message * * *

C: how to find and meet like minded kinky people
From: "Christine" at u4ds.com
Date: Wed, 08 Jul 2009 17:04:33 +0100

Hello,

This message might serve as a guide-line to folk in all areas of
the world, but I'll use Roger's recent message as an example.

In Re: P: San Antonio, Texas - submissive females

Roger wrote:

>Can someone help me get in contact with submissive females

You'll make more progress if you put a bit of effort in yourself
and don't post short messages to DOMestic. Before posting any
message here it's best to read the guidelines on posting (see
below).

If you don't want to post your contact details on the web,
you'll have to go looking for places to meet people in your
area. First look in the right hand menu of the DOMestic blog
for:-

Meeting Others

and, in your specific case, under that you'll see a link for USA,
and beneath that you'll find links for:-

Texas

which might be all you need?

But beneath that you will see links for:-

Dallas/Ft Worth
Houston

If that is not close enough to you, or there is nothing on the
blog that you find useful in your area then you could try a
Google search for something like:-

Kink Munches San Antonio Texas

A "munch" is usually a day-time social gathering of like minded
people, and I see some possibly useful results display for that
search on Google.

If you do find local munches in your area, then do everyone a
favour and post details of your experience with the ones you
attend to the blog and make the DOMestic resource more useful
for everyone.

Also on the right hand menu of the blog are personal ads.

If you want to advertise with a personal ad on DOMestic then I
suggest reading the guidelines thoroughly in the admin section,
again see the right hand menu of the DOMestic blog, for:-

Posting

Personal Ads FAQ

Making Direct Contact

That last one is very important as we will not display your
email address unless you send your post in by email from the
address you wish displayed, and if your email does not display
here then folk can't contact you.

Then take your time and carefully write, spell-check and edit a
long and sincere introduction for the P: section of the digest
(personal ads).

Be sure to avoid brief descriptions, women want to know all
about you, your hopes, desires, interests and ambitions in life,
not just the sex.

As the DOMestic blog is all about dom/sub - one could argue that
dom/sub will be taken for granted. So having established what
your orientation is (dominant) and gender is (male), it's more
important to discuss the things other than dom/sub that interest
you and the things which might attract a partner.

You've already told us where you are, which is an improvement
over some messages we receive. For anyone else reading this, be
sure to mention where you are in the world. As the DOMestic blog
and mailing list is international.

sincerely,
Christine

The DOMestic discussion list. Now in our thirteenth year. The
password site now has over 6,700 files with well over 400
stories, plus pictures, and hundreds of articles. $26.99 for a
one year password. $16.99 for six months.

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: how to find and meet like minded kinky people
Date: 11 Jul 2009 19:10:40 -0000
From: sonia mileu

hi,

im a very dominant lady. enjoy fetish, femdom and kink. want a
submissive playmate. tell me more? where do u stay, etc?

mistress sonia

* * * next message * * *

Re: C: how to find and meet like minded kinky people
From: "Christine" at u4ds.com
Date: Sun, 12 Jul 2009 04:14:38 +0100

Hello,

Someone claiming to be "mistress sonia", and using the name
"sonia mileu", and trying to post an email address "smfun40" on a
well known free email system wrote:

>im a very dominant lady. enjoy fetish, femdom and kink. want a
>submissive playmate. tell me more? where do u stay, etc?

And I've only posted the message to demonstrate the kind of
scams you'll likely see posted without comment on un-moderated
systems, and in the hope that anyone doing a Google search on
those items of "her" identity quoted above will get this scam
warning in their results when Google picks up this post in a day
or two.

The message included an email address in the comments area
posted via the blog form, despite the form saying not to do
that, and despite the form stating that the email address will
be deleted.

Why did the person not state their location in the world, even
when specifically replying to a message in which the first
paragraph was

"This message might serve as a guide-line to folk in all areas
of the world"

and the last paragraph was....

"For anyone else reading this, be sure to mention where you are
in the world. As the DOMestic blog and mailing list is
international."

One might just assume that the person didn't read, and that this
is just stupidity. However I'm certain in my mind that it's just
another scammer who doesn't bother to read anything and will
probably post dozens of similar messages in the near future
using the same and other identities.

Using a simple and free tool we can easily establish that the IP
information for the address used to post is located somewhere
around Kimberley in South Africa.

A link for the IP address with Google Map

No doubt the scammer, by not posting their own location in their
ad, is intending to entice folk from anywhere in the world, on the
assumption that the fictitious "mistress" is perhaps near them.

No doubt the request for replies giving information "tell me
more? where do u stay, etc?" is intended to be the first stage
in one of the now common online scams which ends up milking the
victims.

It's not the first time we've exposed such an obvious scammer,
and warned folk to be careful whom they trust. But occasionally
a reminder does no harm.

This person also presumably didn't read this phrase:-

"If you want to advertise with a personal ad on DOMestic then I
suggest reading the guidelines thoroughly in the admin section"

But if genuine folk want to advertise on DOMestic, you'll find
some useful links and guidelines here:-

http://u4ds.com/2009/07/meet_like_minded_kinky_people.shtml

sincerely,
Christine at Ms-Christine.com

The DOMestic discussion list. Now in our thirteenth year. The
password site now has over 6,700 files with well over 400
stories, plus pictures, and hundreds of articles. $26.99 for a
one year password. $16.99 for six months.

* * * next message * * *

S: In The Bank Manager's Cupboard. Part Thirty-two
From: "Christine" at u4ds.com
Date: Sun, 12 Jul 2009 16:33:27 +0100

Previous issues.

In The Bank Manager's Cupboard - by Ms. Christine
Copyright 1986-2009 Christine and David Stevenson

Part Thirty-two

Sadine had been holding off most of the afternoon
waiting for this session. As soon as 'Toilet' was
locked in place she lowered her leather trousers and
with a sigh of relief emptied her full bladder upon
him. Karin had motioned to leave, but Sadine had
indicated she should stay and watch.

Karin laughed, "Oh! that's beautiful, Toilet is shaking
his head and spluttering around his gag. I think the
ball makes the urine go up his nose and around the
edges into his mouth."

Sadine dug her heels into 'Toilet's' chest, "Stay still
Toilet", she ordered.

Karin approved, "Do you know it's almost as much fun
watching from here as it is sitting and doing it! I'm
so glad they made it in see through perspex, one would
miss so much otherwise."

Sadine agreed, remaining seated even after she had
finished. "It's quite beautiful, this is the first time I've
used one of these see through commodes and I would
like to be able to see 'Toilet' suffer too."

Karin was more than happy to oblige. "I would love to
Sadine, it would be MY PLEASURE".

'Toilet' had not been in Karin's apartment for much
more than half an hour. Already he had suffered the
ultimate humiliation, twice!

Karin and Sadine had come downstairs obviously
exhilarated and delighted. The ladies were talking
quietly and were enthusiastic when they discovered the
source of Sadine and Karin's merriment.

It was at this time that the intercom had announced the
arrival of Catrina, and after she had been served a drink
by 'Pippa' a discussion ensued about the merits of the
'Facility ' upstairs.

It transpired that Catrina had also ordered one from Kayser
Novelty, the supplier of the 'Perspex See Thru Loo'.

Part of the fun for the ladies in these gatherings is
in subjecting the slaves to hearing themselves
discussed. The ladies find they can, simply by chatting
and socialising cause so much suffering. The slave's
ego is constantly reduced without requiring the least
effort on the part of the dominant.

Catrina asked Sadine, "Would you mind if I gave your
'Toilet' a taste of my golden rain?"

Sadine gave her consent, "Of course Catrina, and all of
you, that's what it's there for. Please feel free to
use it at your leisure".

Catrina turned to Karin, "Oh, by the way, I caught the
'Door Opener' lusting after me. Would you permit me to
punish it later?"

Karin approved, "Most certainly, I must give it a
severe punishment later anyway, would you like to go
first?"

Catrina smiled sadistically, "If you are giving it a
severe punishment, then I would prefer to go second.
More pain for less effort!"

This caused general hilarity amongst the ladies and
Christine enquired of Karin,

"What is it being punished for?"

Karin informed her of David's misbehaviour of the
previous night, "A heinous crime indeed, breaches of
rules two and five!"

Marique asked, "Rules two and five?"

Karin explained her regulation to general approbation,
she explained her video system and the use she had
made of it. The ladies were all delighted.

Karin then suggested she open the evening of entertainment
with a video show. She had edited together all of her footage
of David's cell, and dubbed on an explanatory and tongue
in cheek commentary.

Karin had Pippa dim the lights and put on the tape.
Karin's sadistic comments had the company in fits of
laughter, much to David's chagrin. From his position at
the door David could hear almost everything in the
study.

To be discussed in the fashion that he had overheard
was insulting, but the ridicule of Karin's show, the derisory
laughter of the ladies, was humiliating. He was treated to
the full sound track, Karin's commentary, his own moans
and cries. He couldn't actually see the show, but he could
easily imagine what they were seeing.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

This story is one of over 400 stories you can read on the
DOMestic web site. Support DOMestic. Renew / Get your
password at:- http://u4ds.com/password

* * * end of messages * * *

The Fem Dom Training Program. Warning!
Turns your wife/lover into a Dominatrix.

* * * end of digest * * *